Become The Confident Woman You Were Meant To Be
Throughout my life I have been afraid to ask for what I wanted. I always worried what people were going to think. Are they going to think I’m too pushy? Will they assume I’m selfish? Then there was that voice telling me I didn’t deserve what I wanted anyway so who was I to actually ask for it.
I spent a ton of time wishing for things but never taking any action. Then getting frustrated that other people were achieving their goals. What I know now, that I didn’t know then is that I was the only person responsible for my success. It was easier at the time to blame everyone else - my boss, my company, my circumstances. Everyone but me!
At Sophisticated Change our goal is to help you change this way of thinking. Not only should you ask for what you want, you deserve to get it! If you need more on how to change your deserving mindset, check out this post on limiting beliefs. Let’s go through some ways you can improve your confidence and take action to finally get what you want in life.
Decide what you want
To ask for something you need to get clear on what it is that you want. Do you want a new job? OK. What type of job? What companies are you interested in? Get specific with the details of what you want. Vague wants won’t materialize or worse, you could miss an amazing option. Spend some time mapping out your goals and the steps you can take to move you closer to those goals.
I love making vision boards on Pinterest for long term goals and how I want my life to look. You can also write it down in a journal. If you are lost on what you want like l was, try doing some self discovery questions. I do this periodically to make sure I am in touch with what I want in life. It changes!
The point of the prior section is to set yourself up for this one! Be on the lookout for opportunities that are in line with what you are hoping for. It may not be 100% what you were thinking but be open to anything close. Getting started in the right direction will lead to additional opportunities. We talk a lot about small improvements leading to huge change. Our experience has been that taking these small steps build up over time.
So, if you want to leave a bad job and change careers the first small step may be to update your resume. Then tell people you are looking. Then just land a new job in a better company, even if it isn’t exactly what you want. Getting into that better environment will help you attract the opportunity you are after.
Ok so this is the hardest one! Once you see your option you have to go for it! Don’t overthink, just do it. You have already done all the appropriate thinking in the previous steps remember? I realize this is much easier said than done.
If you follow this blog, you likely have perfectionism issues like Michelle and I do. It’s important to remember and keep telling yourself that everything does NOT need to be perfect. Done is better than perfect. People with perfectionism issues tend to procrastinate and avoid doing things that are difficult. If you take action, any action, it’s better than thinking about it but never doing anything.
Be kind to yourself
If everything doesn’t go as planned (which it probably won’t) give yourself a break. Congratulate yourself for going after what you want. If the result wasn’t what you wanted, reflect on the experience and see what learned. There will be more opportunities in the future and you will be ready to act on them as well.
The more action you take to move towards the life you want, the closer you will be to it. You have to let go of the idea of perfection. If everything is always perfect for you it’s a sign you are living small. Identify what you want and have the confidence to take action. Check out our free list of affirmations to build up your confidence!